Some Horning In Is Appreciated

I had driven over to pick up Colleen at her friend’s hours. As I waited for her to collect her thinkgs, I visited with the friend’s mom. I inquired who eles lived ine neighborhood.
“Well, the Honkers live next door.” As I looked across the driveway I said, “oh really. That’s not the name on the mailbox.”
Just at that moment a car pulled up in front of the Honkers’ hous and began honking.
“Now do you understand the name?” my friend asked.
“We don’t need clocks at our house,” she continued. “We scheduled our days according to the Honkers’ honks. The first sound I hear every morning is at 7 a.m. when Mr. Honker’s carpool pulls up to the house and honks. After that initial alarm I have the luxury of turning over and even dropping off to sleep, because at 7:22 I can count on the toot, toot, ta, toot, toot of Junior Honker’s lift to prep school to roust me out of bed.
“I try to have myself dressed, the kids up and breakfast startked before Honk Honker’s 7:45 long, steady blast to hurry up her twin sister, Tonky Honker, who never hears the horn because she’s still blow-drying her hair. So Honky blows again at 7:48. Between these two toots I can cook a perfect three –minute egg.”
“At 8:15 when Little Honker’s preschool ride does a little beep-beep, I usher my family out the door.”
“I Congratulate myself on a successful morning if I have the beds made and the kitchen straigened up by 9 a.m. when Mama Honker backs out of the garage and lays on the horn until the family dog, Ho-Hum-Honker, finally moves from his resting place on the driveway.”
“Gee,” I said, “those people must get on your nerves.”
“Oh, not at all. They’re great neighbors, even if they will be responsible for making the doorbell obsolete,” she went on.
“We’ve come to depend on their honking. Why, last winter their whole family went on a ski trip. While they were gone, our schedule was completely out of whack. We over slept every morning, my husband spent too much time in the shower, I left my electric curlers in too long, and the kids dilly-dallied through their cereal.”
By this time Colleen was ready to go. As we were driving home my thoughts started wandering; I was thinking about the Honker family. I didn’t notice when the stoplight turned green, but the car behind me did and quickly started honking.
The driver’s impatience seemed rather rude. I was tempted to put my car in reverse and back into him to put a silencer on his horn, but I didn’t. I had this feeling that if I did, some family wouldn’t get their morning wake-up call.

May 26, 1982